Friday, June 8, 2007

Michigan Street Diner

220 E. Michigan Street
Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Several times I thought this place was closing (they had a fire at some point) which made me sad, yet I never go here, even though it's just about the only place to eat breakfast in all of downtown Milwaukee. So I returned after several years, wondering if the counter was still sticky, and the place was still generally annoying.

Very little has changed, which is sad. The coffee is bad, and served with Coffee-Mate, which is outrageous, here in the "Dairy State." There are okay hash browns, though they are mushy and wet. The menu says "farm fresh eggs" which I suspect is bullshit-- it's the kind of bullshit you can ususlaly get away with. No one is going to do an investigation to find out if those eggs come from SYSCO, because, really, who cares?

The black, red, white, Elvis, Marilyn decor is bad enough, but what is worse is the fake Fifties music that drove me out of the place as soon as I could finish my food. The Fifties "classics" were digital and remixed in some cases, but other songs seemed to have been recorded by studio musicians whose little guitar and piano flourishes sent me into a deep depression. My two "farm fresh" eggs, runny potatoes, and undrinkable coffee came to $4.81, and getting a dime, a nickel and FOUR PENNIES in change put me over the edge. I'm still happy, somehow, that this place still exists, but I won't be stopping in anytime soon.

--Ray Speen


(no stars)